Babylon A.D.

In a post apocalyptic world where global warming has mucked up the environment and where corporations are the new religion; a mercenary, Thoorop (Vin Diesel), takes a job of transporting a 'special' girl and her minder from Mongolia to New York.

After supposed studio tinkering with the final cut, Babylon AD ends up a vacuous neutered beast of a film. It’s hard to say how much at fault director Mathieu Kassovitz (La Haine) and screenwriter Eric Besnad are since they have publicly stated that this not their intended cut. Despite their protests, we can only judge the work on display; which is greatly flawed.

One would think that director Kassovitz had left his ‘How Actors Should Act’ handbook back in France when dealing with Diesel, Yeoh and lovely actress Melanie Thierry. A particularly guilty scene set in a tent in Alaska where our nuclear family supposedly ‘bond’ and ‘share a laugh’ ends up plain creepy and weird. Like at other points in this film, the scene is misjudged in its direction but there is a resounding feeling that something has been cut immediately preceding this which would make these scenes seem less out of place.

The blame can’t all go on the head of the big nasty studio though (of course, the action scenes are dull since all the money shots have been unceremoniously wrenched to make this a PG12 cert.) the story as it stands is uninteresting and is devoid of character depth. This is not to lecture that all action films have to be character driven, not at all. But what the genre does demand are central characters that either a.) we care about or b.) we enjoy watching them kick the shit out of the big boss’ henchmen. So, because the action has been clipped there is no window for us to like Vin Diesel’s hard man act e.g. ‘Pitch Black’; and because Mr. Diesel’s mercenary is a mono-syllabic oaf we don’t give two flying ones what happens to him.

It’s not all doom and gloom for this venture though. The cinematography and set design conjure a bleak and semi-compelling vision of the future. We may be sick to the teeth of seeing a future filled with scorched skies and radioactive bed sheets but it’s about the only aspect of this film that may be worth the cinema ticket. Otherwise, keep your cash in your pocket and take a look at the director’s cut once it is inevitably is released on DVD.

2/5